Click to find out more

Do you know how to perform CPR?

Do you know how to do CPRKnowing the basics of performing CPR can be the difference between life or death. It could be a friend or heaven forbid your child! Being able to jump in and help can keep blood flowing through their body and keep vital organs alive whilst the ambulance is on the way. I remember watching a women pull her child from the river in Merimbula NSW and she just didn’t know what to do and stood there crying? I was young and thought just DO something DO something! Luckily a person nearby jumped in and started mouth to mouth and CPR while we waited for the ambulance.

CPR (or cardiopulmonary resuscitation) is a combination of chest compressions and rescue breathing (mouth-to-mouth resuscitation). If someone isn’t circulating blood or breathing adequately, CPR can restore circulation of oxygen-rich blood to the brain. Without oxygen, permanent brain damage or death can occur in less than 8 minutes.

CPR might be necessary in many different emergencies, including accidents, near-drowning, suffocation, poisoning, smoke inhalation, electrocution injuries, and suspected sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).

Reading about CPR and learning when it’s needed will give you a basic understanding of the concept and procedure, but it’s strongly recommended that you learn the details of how to perform CPR by taking a course. If CPR is needed, using the correct technique will give someone the best chance of survival.

CPR is most successful when started as quickly as possible, but you must first determine if it’s necessary. It should only be performed when a person isn’t breathing or circulating blood adequately.

First, determine that it’s safe to approach the person in trouble. For instance, if someone was injured in an accident on a busy highway, you’d have to be extremely careful about ongoing traffic as you try to help. Or if someone touched an exposed wire and was electrocuted, you’d have to be certain that he or she is no longer in contact with electricity before offering assistance to prevent becoming electrocuted yourself. (For instance, turn off the source of electricity, such as a light switch or a circuit breaker.)

Once you know that you can safely approach someone who needs help, quickly evaluate whether the person is responsive. Look for things such as eye opening, sounds from the mouth, chest movement, or other signs of life such as movement of the arms and legs.

In infants and younger kids, rubbing the chest (over the breastbone) can help determine if there is any level of responsiveness. In older kids and adults, this also can be done by gently tapping the shoulders and asking if they’re all right.

Whenever CPR is needed, remember to call for 000. Current CPR courses teach you that if you are alone with an unresponsive infant or child, you should perform CPR for about 2 minutes before calling for help.

Three Parts of CPR

The three basic parts of CPR are easily remembered as “CAB”: C for compressions, A for airway, and B for breathing.

  1. C is for compressions. Chest compressions can sometimes restore the flow of blood to the heart, brain, and other organs. CPR begins with 30 chest compressions, followed by two rescue breaths. This cycle is immediately repeated and continued until the child recovers or help arrives. It is not necessary to check for signs of circulation to perform this technique. Rescuers doing compressions should “push hard, fast, and in the center of the chest.” A CPR course will teach you how to perform chest compressions in infants, kids, and adults, and how to coordinate the compressions with rescue breathing.
  2. A is for airway. After 30 compressions have been completed, the victim’s airway must be open for breathing to be restored. The airway may be blocked by the tongue when someone loses consciousness or may be obstructed by food or another foreign object .In a CPR course, participants learn how to open the airway and position the person so the airway is ready for rescue breathing. The course will include what to do to clear the airway if you believe an infant or child has choked and the airway is blocked.
  3. B is for breathing. Rescue breathing is begun after 30 compressions have been completed and the airway is open. Someone performing rescue breathing essentially breathes for the victim by forcing air into the lungs. This procedure includes breathing into the victim’s mouth at correct intervals and checking for signs of life. A CPR course will review correct techniques and procedures for rescuers to position themselves to give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to infants, kids, and adults.

Australian Red Cross and St Johns Ambulance all conduct courses around Australia and teach the latest techniques. They normally include general first aid training such as what to do when someone is choking?, burnt, stopped breathing, has a broken limb or faints.

 

If you going through a tough patch, make some time for your Body, Skin, Hair and Mind

make time for you body hair skin mindSpending time on your personal grooming can help you feel better – physically and emotionally. And feeling better can give you strength. Lets face it, there are many things that can put pebbles on your path – and we all know the occasional boulder 🙂

Don’t let them get you down or let them prevent you from getting out and enjoying life.

You might be invited to a family event, a friends BBQ, a date? or to the footy. Whatever you have on, don’t stay at home because you don’t feel good or quiet yourself. In fact, health experts agree that making an intentional effort to look after yourself will bring about both health and happiness if you just stick at it. Some tips to get you started and back on the happy are:

Body
Yes, that’s exercise. Working out can decrease stress, increase energy and definitely loose some weight. It’s always a great idea to check into your doctor for a chat about what your going to do and get all the regular tests done. That in itself can give you peace of mind.

Skin
Us blokes get into lifetime habits, if you have always washed with the same soap, maybe its time to change to something more sensitive to skin. If you were to ask around there are so many of us already onto it. We are using a gentle face wash, we don’t scrub like we are trying to take oil of the driveway. Treat your skin with respect. Remember skin loves moisturiser and hydration.

Hair
I started losing my hair in my twenties, I went from combing it every day and using “Uppercut” products made by Uppercut Deluxe Australia, I thought I was the coolest guy in my suburb to having it clipper-ed short every other week, i was still happy. I started with a number 3 a year later went No.2, then 1 and now its a full shave every 2 days. Lets face it, hair on your head (or without) or on your face represents who you are, its your trademark…it’s your brand! It gives you a look that people can make assumptions on. Are you Conservative, Formal, Rock star, Hipster or just however it falls? Take the hair quiz and find out a little more about what your hair really represents, click here: which facial hair style best sums your up?. Check out Uppercut deluxe video:

I recommend use a barber and get some of this product, it will make you feel good 🙂

Mind
You must find a way to relax your mind. Look for peaceful things to do, quiet times and times where you can be just on your own. Try massage therapy or even a simple head and shoulder massage at one of the many that are now located in our local markets around town. Unwind with some music or guided meditation. Other techniques such as yoga, deep breathing and meditation may also be useful: discuss the options with your doctor when you book that appointment.

Watching The Footy: What to do when the boys come around

boys watching the footyThe boys are coming over. What results is a football frenzy that may, or may not involve drinking, eating and possibly a little bit of raucous behaviour. When your team loses it could spoil the day but if you follow these tips, regardless of the results, you’ll always be a winner.

 

Food

You want something that’s easy to prepare so you’re not distracted from the business of watching the game. Rev up the BBQ and you can knock out some delicious and easily prepared food that will satisfy everyone. If you’re going for steaks and chops, make sure they’re in the marinade on the morning of the game. Overnight is even better. Throw them on the BBQ and away you go.

Snacks

Chips (hot and cold), dips, something healthy and something not so healthy. Know your friends and their dietary choices – you don’t want to exclude Keith the Vegan by laying on a meat-feast and forgetting to include some vegetables. Cover all your bases by supplying a wide range of snacks but remember that it might be a good idea to stagger the snack distribution; you don’t want everyone filling up before those chops and steaks come off the barbeque.

Drinks

Yes, beer and footy-watching go together like steak and chips but it may be the case that not all of your friends want to throw down booze and shout at the television. Maybe they’d like to shout at the television while drinking an orange juice or a non-alcoholic cocktail? Never pressure anyone to drink and always respect their choices. But for those who do want a beer, wine or rum and coke, be sure to keep the esky filled with ice and selections. Maybe suggest a pre-match kitty so everyone contributes?

Location of the TV

outdoor lunch watching the footyIt’s no good having the barbeque outside and the television inside. How will you catch all the action if there’s a wall between you and the game? Hearing your mates screaming in excitement is no match for actually seeing what’s going on, so either move the TV to a spot that’s visible from the barbeque or move the barbeque to a spot where you can see the TV – even if it means bringing the barbeque inside the house. That’s a joke. Don’t do it.

Sore losers and bad winners

Everyone knows the terrible pain of watching a favourite team lose and most people know the exhilarating joy of watching their team come out victorious. No one likes a sore loser and no one likes a graceless winner. Rubbing your team’s victory in the face of a loser is not good form and will often result in the breaking down of a friendship. As winner, offer condolences such as Well played, old chap. Better luck next time. And extend your hand in a gesture of solidarity and love of the game. Or just yell Sucker and run away.

What pre-footy rituals do you have? How do you like to watch the action? Share your answers in the comment box below.

OUT ON A LIMB

dads out-on-a-limbA book written by Simon Turner, containing helpful and practical suggestions to navigate the journey of separation and divorce. It is not legal advice nor gospel, rather it is real insight and learning’s from his recent experiences and observations whilst working through family law in Australia.

We enter this journey blindly and are completely unaware of what lies ahead. Most of us are not solicitors and are completely ignorant to what is the correct way to go about it versus the wrong way,  if you go forward without any advice or knowledge you will only learn lessons and those lessons come at a very dear price.

The book begins with some very clear and straightforward advice from a judge, which radically changed Simon’s understanding and ultimately his situation, the judge said…

You both think your right
Show me you have time
Show me you have a place

Separation &/ or Divorce whether you asked for it or not will frustrate you, sadden you, financially hurt you, emotionally drain you, distract you, challenge your logic and thoughts of what fair. Simon say’s “When everything appears to be spinning out of control, try standing still like a rock and see where things fall.”

There are ways and things that you can do to prepare yourself for a better outcome and keep your sanity along the way. This books provides an opportunity for you to be prepared, you are starting a journey that nothing you have ever done will prepare you for.

Simon has covered in good detail many topics and in his own words called some of them…

  • The 3 golden rules
  • Delaying the inevitable
  • Personal enemy number 1
  • Your guardian angle
  • The simple truth
  • Grizzly bear the cost of it all
  • You say, she say, hearsay
  • Sharing is caring
  • Deal or no deal
  • The big day
  • Abiding by the decision
  • No regrets
  • and many more….

During this time in your life, emotions will run high, you can be led down a road that you don’t know yourself any more and the decisions you make can alter your future for good or bad. We can be our own enemy and create damage for our self, our relationships and our children if our emotions are not in check. All our actions and behaviors are within our control,  how we behave during this time is what we will be judged on. Take the time to grab a copy of Simon’s book and knowledge up. I assure you it will help.

You can buy a copy of this book by clicking here.

Best wishes for all the guys going through this.

How well do our children know us?

your story your wordsEveryone of us has a story to tell. Our life is unique to us and our journey, experiences, feelings and memories to date have carved us into who we are today. These experiences can be shared with our children in a creative way. Below are many questions that often don’t get asked, you can go a lifetime and your children will not know the answers to any of these insights into your lifetime.

It can bring you closer &/or open up topics for further discussions. Answer the questions as if your child is asking them. Why don’t you copy and print them out – take your time to answer them carefully and honestly, include as many photos as possible then present it to your child/children as a gift.  You could even get it published online as a book for little cost, simply Google “online publishing” and there are many to research and choose from 🙂

 Questions to share:

  1. Tell me about the time and place you were born
  2. What are your earliest memories?
  3. Tell me about your Mum and Dad
  4. What do you think your parents thought of you as a child?
  5. What interesting information do you know about other people in your family?
  6. Detail what you know of our family tree?
  7. Tell me some more about your family that may interest generations to come.
  8. What do you remember about the places you lived when you were a child?
  9. What were your favorite childhood toys or games?
  10. Tell me about your best friends as a child.
  11. What do you remember about holidays as a child?
  12. What sort of pets did you have when you were a child and what was their names?
  13. What were you best at when you were at school?
  14. What did you want to do when you grew up?
  15. Who was your best friend as a teenager and why?
  16. What were your favorite hobbies when you were young?
  17. Did you have a idol when you were young? tell me who and why.
  18. What was the first piece of music you bought?
  19. What would have been your top 10 favorite pieces of music when you were young?
  20. Describe any family traditions you had when you were young? or maybe still have.
  21. What age did you start work and tell me about the jobs you have had?
  22. What was the first car you ever owned and tell me about the other vehicles you have had?
  23. How did you meet my mother?
  24. What were some of the things you would do on a night out with each other?
  25. Describe a special day you had with my mother?
  26. How did you feel when you found out you were going to be a father?
  27. What did you think when you first saw me after I was born?
  28. What were my statistics when I was born – time of birth, height and weight?
  29. What did I look like when I was born?
  30. Did you have a nickname when you were young? what was it and why?
  31. Before I was born what other names were you thinking of calling me?
  32. What was the first word or words you remember me saying?
  33. Describe some of the favorite memories you have of me when I was a child?
  34. What was I like when I was a child?
  35. What attributes did I have as a child and still have now?
  36. What were you most proud of me when I was at school?
  37. Describe what you like about me?
  38. Is there anything you would like to change about me?
  39. What are the happiest memories of your life so far?
  40. What are a few of your favorite things?
  41. Tell me about the tings that make you laugh?
  42. Describe your memory of a major world event that has happened in your life.
  43. Describe the greatest change that you have seen in your lifetime so far.
  44. Describe something you still want to achieve in your life.
  45. Tell me about the dream you have for your life.
  46. If you were an animal what type of animal would you be and why?
  47. If you won the lottery what would you do with the money?
  48. What have you found most difficult in your life?
  49. What is your biggest regret in your life and can you do anything about it now?
  50. With hindsight what would you do differently?
  51. Tell me something you think I wont know about you.
  52. What would you like your epitaph to say?
  53. Is there anything you would like to say sorry for?
  54. What piece of advise would you like to offer me?
  55. Is there anything else you would like to say that hasn’t been mentioned?
  56. And now for the record…
    • Your full name?
    • DOB
    • What colour are your eyes?
    • How tall are you?
    • How much do you weigh?
    • What blood group are you?
    • What was the date you completed this journal for me?

Create a treasured family keepsake, share you life, your journey, your memories, your laughs and even your challenges.

Finding a way back from infidelity

infidelityDid you have an affair and are wondering how you can find your way back and recover from what could be lost forever. What are some of the steps to try and save your relationship as your partner now feels betrayed, cheated and has lost all trust and respect in you? What can you do to help your partner recover after you have chosen a road for them that they never asked for?
Ideas to assist in your journey
  • Own the problems that you created by having an affair. be truthful. you cannot change what you don’t acknowledge.
  • It is unfair to compare a new, exciting, taboo fantasy relationship to one you’ve been in for years where there are kids, bills to pay, a house to run and noses to wipe. That is a ridiculous comparison.
  • In order to resolve your relationship, contact with “the other person” must be cut off 100 percent. You can’t work on dealing with the consequences of the affair while you’re still having it.
  • Don’t rely on your heart to tell you what to do; rely on your intellect. Do what logic tells you is the right thing to do.
  • Make the hard decisions. Either leave the marriage to free your partner, or commit to stay. Remember, checking out of one relationship before you finish it appropriately doesn’t work.
  • Ask yourself: What are you doing to help your partner get past the affair?
  • Be mature enough to recognize that life is not always all about you and what feels good for you in the moment. If you are married and have children, you have an obligation and a commitment that far transcends what feels good.
  • Help the partner who did not have the affair find emotional closure. You must do whatever it takes until your partner finds it. If it requires you to check in with your spouse multiple times a day, then do it. It’ll require you being where you’re supposed to be, when you’re supposed to be, 24 hours-a-day, seven days-a-week, so your spouse can trust you again. And you do it until.
  • If a child was born of the infidelity, you will have to have contact with the other person in order to be co-parents. And you do this the right way by not having any contact without your spouse’s involvement. If you want to talk with the other person, then you do it with your spouse present.
  • Want to know if something is cheating? If you wouldn’t do it with your spouse standing there, it’s cheating.
  • If your marriage is over and you have children, understand that your relationship with your ex will never end. You will always at least be co-parents of your children. Build a new relationship as their allies.
  • Do you know what a healthy relationship is? Figure out what you want and behave your way to success.

We acknowledge Dr Phil for these tips.

 

Who’s up for giving back to the community

communityThere is very little I can think of that gives you the same buzz that you get from giving your time to help others and making the community a better place.

There is so much negativity around, we see it all the time i.e. road rage, people dropping litter, graffiti, treating the elderly poorly, hunger, homeless, unemployment etc Have I made you depressed yet? I feel it just writing this part 🙂 but we can balance all of that by doing good and intentionally making a difference to others.

There are many organizations that you can volunteer your time. SEEK Volunteer  is a non-profit initiative designed to make volunteering easier. You can search by location, how much time you have to give and category of cause: including everything from animal welfare, seniors, disaster relief, sport and mentoring.

I was invited to a Christmas carol sing along at a church group on Friday night, I am not what you would call a religious person but always up for a Christmas Carol.  I was very impressed in the modern and “current” theme of the church – there was not one cross or picture of Jesus in sight.

The church was called “Edge Church” they have just opened in Melbourne a year ago and have campuses in Adelaide, UK and Long Island NY.  My church experiences were that of the old fashion stereotypical church building (high ceilings, uncomfortable wooden seats and lots of lead-light) with the minister up front reading the bible. No one back then looked happy 🙁

The Edge Church is in a nicely converted/renovated factory, great facilities, cafe, a beautiful room for the congregation – and with very comfy seats, great sound and audio visual equipment and a very talented band and singers to entertain us and to sing along too, it had a real happy vibe. Unlike the church of old days, the Edge Church actively gets involved in the community to make a difference. Edge Church moto is “Serving our Community with Hope, Truth & Love”.

Drop in, you might be as impressed as I was? I hope to see you out there.

Thirteen ideas on reducing stress

How many times have you felt stressed lately? Stress is the body’s physical, mental, and chemical reaction to circumstances that irritate, frighten, excite, confuse, or endanger us.

Stress can come from many different directions.   It can be a truck wheeling around a corner toward us, a move to a new home, loud music, divorce and separation, plus many other things such as trouble at work?

Be kind on yourself and follow these basic principles to help handle personal and business stress.  Review this list from time to time and become familiar with your own personal coping strategies when stress arrives and be aware of ways to reduce stress in your own life.

1. Have fun to reduce stress.

Do things for the sheer fun of it. Each day, plan to something “just for you.” Even if you only have 30 minutes of fun time, don’t let anything stop you from your 30 minutes.

2. Laugh to reduce stress.

Interact with people who make you laugh to reduce tension and boost the immune system.

3. Learn to say “no” to reduce stress.

Too much fun can become boring and stressful in itself. When requests and invitations become a burden instead of being enjoyable, it is time to say “no.”

4. Simplify your life to reduce stress.

Move closer to your work or hire a house cleaner, or shop by internet.

5. Delegate responsibility to reduce stress.

Sharing duties allows time together and gets the job done faster.

6. Learn to relax to reduce stress.

Periodically visualize calming scenes; stretch and take deep breaths, a favourite of mine has always be guided meditation CD’s, there are plenty to download on the internet.

7. To reduce stress, don’t be a workaholic.

Find a healthy balance between work and play.

8. Break tasks into segments to reduce stress.

Break down tasks into easy-to-handle segments and problems. It is easier to eat an elephant one bite at a time.

9. Take care of your family and friends to reduce stress.

Having relationships in your life is less stressful.

10. Examine work habits to reduce stress.

If you are constantly stressed at work, examine your work habits. Maybe you are wasting time.

11. Drink water to reduce stress.

Consume 8-10 glasses of pure water daily to reduce stress.

12. Go for a walk

Exercise reduces stress, go for a long walk around the block or the park and breath, you will be amazed how much fresh air helps, make this regular even when you dont feel stressed.

13. Visit a Bunnings store

Find your nearest Bunnings, grab a sausage and a latte and walk around for an hour, choose a D.I.Y project that you can do and have fun!

There are plenty more ways of reducing stress, feel free to comment and add more…

If you have the chance, what will you do different

what would you do differentAustralian Nurse Bonnie Ware writes of the phenomenal clarity of vision that people gain at the end of their lives, and how we might learn from their wisdom. “When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently,” she says, “common themes surfaced again and again.”

1. I wish I‘d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

“This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.”

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

“Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

“This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”

This insightful information from people who were about to die is hopefully a strong message to all of us. Does your road need changing?  If so, don’t have unfulfilled dreams – get on it NOW.

What if the kids want to cut their visit short

If there is something upsetting your child, it helps if you have a cooperative ex spouse. They can assist you with explaining to your child that we have agreed that there is time spend with both mum and dad and it is your time with your dad now.  If your ex is hostile, they will probably make the situation worse by sympathizing with your child.

Your response to your child is important when they say “I want to go back to mum house”.

I would start by asking “what is wrong” and lets talk about it and try and resolve it. If it is just because you have disciplined them for being naughty, then the conversation could be more “I understand your not happy because I told you off but going home to your mums is not the answer”.

You could say that that your mum and I have agreed that in times like these going home is not an option. If they persist, a response can be “Going home whenever we have an issue is not how we solve things, let talk about it and work it out.

Loosing your temper will not help, If you feel upset, just say we will talk about this in a little while when both of us have calmed down. If it is because your child misses their mother, then maybe a suggestion to call and say hello. It would never be ok for you to accuse your child of loving their mother more.  It is not about that, they will probably be young and just simply missing the other parent.

A walk or an activity can always be a good distraction, keep busy with a bike ride or get a basketball and shoot some baskets down at the local court? You might even suggest that next time they should bring a photo of their mother so they can have it on there shelf.

You could also provide an activity for them – to make something special for their mum. Bunnings kids activitiesBunnings have quiet a few children’s  activity classes for kids over the age of 5 and you must accompany them. It would be worth checking out your nearest store for their times and taking your child along to make something for their mum. You can see more information here

Try your best to be understanding and compassionate, nothing will get resolved if you stand firm and say you are staying here hail rain or shine. Planning in advance to have one of their friends over for a play can help or arranging to drop your child at their friends house for  couple of hours can make them feel happy and that you understand their life needs to continue as normal as possible. I bet when you pick them up they will be happy that you provided the play date.

If you know people in your neighborhood with similar aged kids, it might be worthwhile in getting to know them so that you can do joint activities. There is a great group called Single Parent Active Kids they organise activities for single parents (for both mums and dads) to get together with kids and share fun activities, definitely worth checking it out, I have a post on them here: https://www.dadsonline.com.au/single-parents-active-kids

How To Juggle Parenthood With A FIFO Mining Job

fifo mining jobsThere’s no doubt the Fly In Fly Out lifestyle is tough on the families of mining workers. Ever since the 1980’s, Australian gas, oil and mining operation staff are required to fly out to remote locations to work ten to fourteen hour shifts for two to six weeks at a time. While the financial gains from this type of work are generous, the long term effects on individuals, couples and especially families are difficult to ignore.

 It’s safe to say that workers and their families teeter precariously between two completely different worlds. However, maintaining a balance for the sake of your family, your relationship and for yourself is imperative to surviving through those challenging times. Here’s some tips for maintaining that balance with a FIFO Mining Job.

Join A Support Group

Just like Mothers group or Book reading groups, there’s one for FIFO families as well. One of the biggest is FIFO Families. This group is targeted towards the partners of FIFO workers and provides a plethora of services and support.  There’s groups in every state who meet weekly at the local park, arrange school/kindy drop offs, exercise together, swap time (look after each other’s kids so you can do those things you want) and share parenting tips.

Make The Most Of Your Time Together

Parenthood is hard work and although being home together isn’t always peaches and cream, try to organise things to do as a family unit. Make it something to look forward to. It will boost family moral and take the focus off the fact that your partner will eventually have to return to work.

Keep The Lines Of Communication Open

Children will face emotional distress spending time looking forward to Mum or Dad’s return and then having to say goodbye again. This is especially hard when they may not have been separated for prolonged periods of time. Being open and honest with your children will help them to understand why Mum or Dad have to leave. Melanie Hearse from Essential Baby writes “Never say ‘Daddy is leaving again’ I say ‘Daddy is off to work’, and show them where he is on a map.”

Set Goals

Setting goals is a powerful process for thinking about your ideal future. By writing down your goals in a visible place you’ll feel an overwhelming motivation to turn your vision of this future into reality. Your goals can be varied either focusing on family, self-improvement, professional growth or relationships. For example, your goals could be that you want to take at least one hour of “me time” a week or work towards finishing a TAFE course. Or it could be that you want to deposit $50 – $100 a week into a savings account for a family holiday.

Have A Routine

Create a realistic routine that you know can easily be stuck to when your partner is home. This might be negotiating strict bed times, planning meals ahead of time or ensuring your children complete their chores.

Keep A Calendar

As simple as this sounds, utilizing a calendar will help you keep on top of upcoming events, bill payments, school holidays, appointments, birthdays and most importantly, your partners work schedule.  You can also keep an online version of your calendar via Google Calendar that your partner will be able to access and add too from their work site.

Whilst the fly in fly out arrangement isn’t always ideal, staying organised and seeking support will help make the changes to your new lifestyle more manageable.

R U OK?

R U OK? Thursday September 12th 2013R U OK? Day, Thursday September 12th 2013 is a national day of action dedicated to inspiring all Australians to ask family, friends and colleagues, ‘Are you ok?’ By regularly reaching out to one another and having open and honest conversations, we can all help build a more connected community and reduce our country’s high suicide rate.

R U OK? Day is on the second Thursday of September (12th September 2013).

More than 2,200 Australians suicide each year and men are around 3 times more likely to die by suicide than females (ABS 2012). For each person that takes their life, another 30 people attempt to end their own life (SANE Australia).

Most people don’t openly share their feelings, particularly if they’re struggling. The best thing we can all do is regularly talk to the people we care about – regardless of whether they are at risk – because connection is good for us all.

In the time it takes to have your coffee, you can start a conversation that could change a life.

Dads, who will you ask?